I have been rejecting the things that no longer suit me:
- giving away clothes that no longer make me feel fabulous;
- giving away books that I no longer want to read (and when you're housing around 2000 books that's a lot of potential giveaways!);
- putting aside thought patterns that don't serve me well - the negative self-talk, self-deprecating humour (that I'm so good at, but is only half in jest), pain from physical conditions I'm too scared to face up to;
- working to change habits that don't support the best version of myself - comfort or boredom eating, staying up until 2am because I can't be bothered to get off the sofa, making excuses for things I don't want to do;
- tolerating people who are negative, narcissistic, bigoted, racist, homophobic.
And instead I'm filling my life slowly with things that bring me joy and help me become the best version of me that I can be.
- I use my favourite beautiful china mugs every day instead of keeping them for "special occasions" (and the same for other things in my household... bedding, towels, crockery, flower vases);
- I only wear clothes that feel good against my skin and make me feel fabulous;
- I'm reading books that make me think and help me grow as a person;
- I'm talking to myself kindly, respectfully, lovingly, as I do to my friends (but which I've never done to myself);
- I get up earlier and try to get to bed earlier;
- I'm making more art, sewing more, writing a little more each day;
- I'm planning more for myself and my business (I used to be good at helping other people plan, but never found time to apply my strategies to my own life!) and making sure I action those plans;
- I'm putting myself out of my comfort zone, and tackling challenges instead of avoiding them - this includes health challenges that I'm getting sorted even though it means significant surgery and recovery time... and I'll have to ask for and accept help from people around me.... more on how hard that is another time.
And the biggest one - I am actively looking for things every day that I can respond to with gratitude, and with awe and wonder. I find it easy to find things around me every day that are so spectacular they take my breath away - sunrises, birdsong, my amazing sons, art, music, other people - but I've been struggling to find things internally to be grateful for. So now every evening I reflect on the day and find something about myself that I'm grateful for, and something about myself that has filled me with awe or wonder (or pride.... I am finding it easier to be proud of things I do rather than dismissing them).
Yesterday I was proud of my intellect that allowed me to create a connection map of a complex organisation that I knew very little about, and I did that during a phone conversation rather than face to face so I exercised all my listening and questioning skills. And my client was thrilled with it.
And I am in awe of my hairdresser's memory - she sees so many people in the times between my haircuts, but she picks up the conversation and all the personal details as if there had not been a 5 week gap since the last sentence was spoken. Wow! Interpersonal skills of the highest order, and also the best hairdresser I've found in our town (and I've tried lots of them!)
So what has made you respond with awe and wonder this week? If you can't think of anything, take some extra time today to look round you and you'll be surprised at just how awesome the world can be.
